Labels: enniesWith a deep breath, I plunge forward. This blog has been rather sparse if not emotional of late. I have been pretty preoccupied, not only work wise but heart wise. I've been a basket of emotions and having constant random breakdowns. I've tried running and acting but it is time to admit what I've been hiding - problems that have existed for some time. The ennies are no more together.It started out pretty simple...or so I thought. Initially, I thought hey, maybe I need some time away considering things were not fantastic before I left and I could do with some space to figure out if this was what I really wanted. I knew that if I stayed,it would have been for life and I wasn't sure if I was ready for that as I seemed to be having some doubts. Little did I know, he was thinking the opposite and was ready to change for me. Bad timing indeed...When I returned, I tried to make things work, refusing to give up so soon. However,the more he sensed my doubts and hesitations, the worse it all became. Now, reading his deepest thoughts, I wonder where it all went wrong...LH told me this would happen, that no good would come out of me handling things this way. K told me this was the right way as if I had done otherwise, it would have been uglier. Well, I wouldn't know considering I had already chose my path and can only stick with it. Yet, time and time again I catch myself thinking if this is really all that healthy and how I wished I could have protected him from all this pain.There are many things I wish and pray for, yet I can't make them happen by my own actions. I feel so so guilty and selfish. I really had no idea how things turned out this way ... I think back everyday and wonder ... at first I thought I was doing it for us. But now, the only thing I seem to have done was hurt you more and more. *sigh*I do not know if I can ever forgive myself or let myself love again. I am so afraid of hurting ... of breaking someone else. It is scary to have these strings in your hands and a big part of me is afraid to take new ones up. There is this light at the end ... the path is alot clearer now than 2 months ago. Am I ready to take baby steps forward?Dear you, words to you have been said elsewhere. Just know, I will always love you.
I'm a busy woman ya? So busy, I spent the entire weekend sleeping in and only managing 2 pages of my final term paper. *heh* I did at least manage to shake my booty .. off which I had to blow some dust. Tommy & I choreo-ed the FY dance for "Talanto". Will upload the vid if I can get my hand on it. *wheuweet* Bird got loads of cheers that night. *heh* He was definitely an inspiration for future performances :P Our retro theme with You're the one I want off Grease OST was quite a hit I must say. :D More pictures of "Talanto" on the way... Other than school, Middle east and hall, teaching's another big part of my life. Thank goodness primary school exams are out of the way. Wednesday phonics classes do not end till later though. I teach Primary 3 and below and every Wednesday, poor Kenny has to face a grumpy me. Dealing with 4x 5-yr-olds is rather draining...but satisfying nontheless. :) ~the artwork of a 5-yr-old~ More importantly, last Friday I pre-celebrated Hui's 22nd @ MOS. Hmm...that was quite eventful I must say. The Ennies were Hui's supporting party and poor Harold didn't get to see much of the club. *heh* Shall not embarrase the poor babe any further ... she'll probably hear no end of it for a year. Friday's party was way better. Thanks Harold for all you did for my lady.. :) Dear Hui, hope you enjoyed yourself. Happy 22nd and may you never end up the way you did that eventful night. :D Love ya darling! ~self-entertaining Ennies @ MOS~ ~e burfday gurl @ New Majestic Bar~ ~kisses for the princess~ And last but not least, I finally went for a much-needed hair cut. ~Ta da!!~ Talk about a long update...I'm tired. Labels: ennies, raffles hallOkay right. I apparently do not blog often enough to warrant visits. *bleh*So what's Penny so busy with? Hmm..updates updates.First up, school of course. Exams are looming ever nearer. 26th is my first paper and I've obviously not started mugging. Still left with 1 term paper and 1 project (and I'm sitting here blogging) ... but it ain't too bad cause I've got at least 1 week per module so it's cool.What's taking alot of me time tho is the Middle East trip. Now, to the uninvolved-in-Penny's-life people, I'm going on a major school trip this Dec. TO THE MIDDLE EAST!!!!! *woohoo* To be exact - 23 days in UAE, Saudi, Qatar and Egypt! Hmm...Chirstmas in Egypt should be fun except they don't celebrate Christmas in Dec. bummer...I'm leaving on the 7th till the 30th so any orders, please place now. :D
~w the only Nov baby present @ Arab street dinner~Then there was the BEP concert which happened thanks to birdie. Thanks bird!! Hope you liked your dim sum dinner treat. :) Click Five started it off with a few numbers that ended up an hour long. They really made me feel old next to all the screaming (young) girls. :( As for the BEP, Fergie's good actually...and hot. Pity the other three couldn't really hold a tune.Bird forgot about a camera and I obviously do not have one, so we survived on my 2mp camera phone. *haha* At least you can see the stage... :P The 2 smart NUS undergraduates only thought of finding better seats in the last hour so here's the better view we got after a long long time:
~BEP with Where is the Love
~the really cool inflatable monkey~In hall, I've been really non-existent. Feeling a little out of place in my block with all the yr 1 girls and yr 4 boys. Where have all the female FYs gone??!! Oh wait, there aren't any. We are a sad batch.... BUT! We successfully pulled off "Talanto" - another FYSP. Congrats congrats...especially to Jack, this year's winner. To the clueless, "Talanto" is a talent competition organised by the final years. 1st prize's a $200 cash prize sponsored by us of course. :)
~our retro theme~
~e lovely ladies~
Labels: ennies
~lovely sunset @ Cafe Del Mar~ I miss you bu. Hurry home. And darling, Happy 27th Month anniversary.I've come to really enjoy the special ennies days out. Those intellectual outings, beach playtime and walks we had are starting to take their special places in my heart.K's now on another work trip to Myanmar but before he left, we managed to squeeze in another special outing - a short trip to Cafe Del Mar in Sentosa to catch up on our books.My current read - Star Struck by Pamela Anderson. Trust me, this is one good beach read. It is totally brainless and full of juicy sexy tidbits.
As you can see, he's supposed to be reading The 10-Day MBA but I convinced K to read the first chapter which was full of erm...action in a certain part of the house. Well, in Pam's case, various parts of the house.
Labels: ennies
Labels: enniesTo K's kong kong who passed on the 14th of Jun 07:You led a life filled with love and laughter. For the short 2 years I've known you, there was never a time that went without humour and laughter.You led a life by example that will be carried on by those you left behind. Seeing the love your grandchildren have for you, I have a renewed respect for you sir.Those 5 days spent in Seksyen 17 have touched and inspired me. I strife to lead a life like yours - with love, respect and by example. I have learnt much from you kong kong.I never stopped thanking God for giving me K and now I thank Him too, for giving you to him.We know that if our earthly dwelling, a tent, should be destroyed, we have a building from God; a dwelling not made with hands, eternal in heaven.~Corinthians 5:1, 6-10~
The 26th of May was D-day for some...and I was expecting it to be one for me too. It was the day Mechanical Engineering Year 3 results were released. Unfortunately, that day was rather busy for me and I thus put off the checking till 27th morning. (Think I was just scared :S)
*drum roll*
Penny had her best result yet! Sem CAP: 4.0/5.0 *weehoo*
Okay, prob to many it ain't fantastic...but still...I'M HAPPY :D Dear K was the first to know (sorry for waking you up..heh) and he was real nice to take me out for a celebratory dinner @ Modesto's, Vivocity... *weehoo*
~the celebrant~
~the celebrator~
Labels: enniesToday is day 5. Counting down to Saturday to K's return from Myanmar.It's only been a week and the last time I've missed him so much for such a short of period of time was when we first started dating. That was like...2 years ago! Maybe cause this time I don't get to talk to him at night? Gone are my daily closures...This is so unlike me. haha...and I think I know why.It's all because of the last Friday night we spent together. I've changed since that night. I sat up thinking about it when he had slept and had done so for a few days after. I've made some decisions and life-changing choices. I've matured. :)Hurry home Mr Wong. I miss you.
Had a lovely dinner with K last night @ Morton's The Steakhouse @ The Oriental. For those who have heard of it, you would know of its exorbitant prices. Goodness, when I first saw their menu a few weeks back, my eyeballs nearly popped out. A piece of ribeye for $84??!! If not for LL's generous $100 gift cert, Morton's would be on my to-visit list till I'm probably 40.From the moment I made my reservation call, I could tell their service was exceptional. And it definitely did not disappoint. The staff really seemed to enjoy their work and their interactions with customers were just exceptional. You really can't help but have an enjoyable evening there.Many things about that place stood out but these were the most memorable:The huge warm loaf of bread served that seemed to feed more than the two of us.The "visual" menu - fresh whole vegetables, lobsters (it was moving) and salmon were wheeled to your table to introduce you to their dishes. And this "visual menu" concept was applied to the alcohol and desserts selection too!!The friendly banter and jokes cracked by the staff.The warm chocolate cake that takes 30mins to prepare...yummylicious I tell ya...
~Morton's cosy interior~
~feast for the night~
~delightable sin~
~the ennies~
Labels: ennies
I miss him.
The ambience was nice, the food was fantastic and the company...delightful. Valentine's Day is a day for expressing (rather explicitly I believe) one's love for another. I've heard stories of sleepless nights for gifts preparation, hundreds of dollars for bouquets of flowers, extravagant room decoration, etc. Sadly, I didn't receive a present nor a flower (unless you count a peacock feather which doesn't even belong to me...). However, yesterday was to me, the most meaningful Vdae ever. We may have only gone for a simple dinner but, his actions for that day spoke volumes to me. For not being upset and angry at my late arrival (at yet another special occasion), for tolerating fatigue and gastric, for being so compliant at my over zealous photo-taking.... *Happy Valentine's darling*The ennies celebrated Valentine's a day earlier this year unlike the last. We thought we'd be a wee bit smarter and avoid being one of the Vdae suckers. But alas, we found ourselves in another group - the idiots avoiding being a Vdae sucker but still celebrating it. *sigh*
But hey! I'm a girl...i'm entitled to a day of romance ya? heh.
Anyhoos, we found ourselves a place at BROTH - Bar Restaurant on the Hill, Duxton Hill to be exact. I decided on this little quaint restaurant as my dear friend Eric works there. Trust me, it's reeaallly good knowing someone like him. *winkz* 
~the lovely cobbled street it's on~
~our view for the night~
~with love~ Labels: enniesHad a good talk with K today. You know those kind of talks where you let everything out and...he somehow makes you feel all better? The kind that makes you really thank God for bringing him into your life.Who he is and the things he says....sometimes amazes me. It is totally unexpected and just takes your breath away.Today, he managed to squeeze my heart tight. Again. Only twice in this past 22months has he done so. The first time he asked and..tonight.Penny, you're a lucky girl.
030207 Labels: enniesgentle breezes and lil small waves.
mini sand dunes and shaded sunrays.
a few hours amongst the precious few.
to spend a lazy day lying with you.
|hIsToRy|
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Name: Penelope Koh
D.O.B: 3rd Dec '85
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